I remember what I was going to write now, I got waylaid talking about video games.
The biggest problem with SAD is or at least it seems to be getting people to understand. I know when I mentioned it at work there were a few awkward smile, laughs even – I know when I’ve mentioned it to my mum she’s been like “don’t be silly”. Its a tricky one. In the one hand people not realising its a serious problem kinda makes me feel like its not so big an issue, on the other hand it pisses me off when people don’t take me seriously.
I mean, I can’t control it and I have no control over when and where it seems to affect me. I can seem fine and dandy one minute, reclusive and withdrawn the next. Its also hard for Sue to understand. I mean its not necessarily anything that she’s done that’s upset me or “put me in a mood”, its just something that happens.
Sometimes I just want to be alone, over times all I want to do is surround myself with friends and good conversation. I’m funny like that.
Not ha ha funny.
Its depression, but not proper depression. Especially not when it’s controlled by the amount of light you’re getting. I mean I know some people do take pills for it, I know a few weeks ago I would have jumped at the chance of something to ease the numbness, now I’m not so sure.
I’m going to bed shortly, its not even 8, Sue doesn’t even finish work until 8:30 Its just what I feel like, just feel like lying down, putting a DVD on.
I’m going to finish this post with some lyrics courtesy of Snow Patrol
If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me and just forget the world?
